G Spot: Myth Or Real?
Over the past week or so, I’ve had quite a few friends send me articles related to a recent study by a British research team in regards to the female G Spot.
As you probably know, we have dedicated an entire resource, The Ultimate Guide To The Female G Spot, so I think some of these emails were intended to “nudge” us a bit…“Hey, look at this. The G Spot is a myth!”
Because some of you “nudged” me…and because questions related to the G Spot are probably the single biggest “technical” question I get…I thought addressing this study and the G Spot, in general, was worth a post.
First, to be fair to my “nudgers,” if you only scanned some of the articles describing this study, it might be possible to believe that this study did prove that the G Spot is “a myth.”
The USA Today article includes the following quotes:
A British research team says the elusive G-spot erogenous zone may be a myth encouraged by magazines and sex therapists, the BBC reports.
And…
“It is rather irresponsible to claim the existence of an entity that has never been proven and pressurize women and men, too,” says Andrea Burri, author of the study, according to the BBC.
Most of the articles I found about this study were similarly one-sided and non skeptical about the supposed “findings” of this study.
But, not all…
In the CNN.com article, you’ll find a good description of the study:
Researchers at King’s College London in the United Kingdom have brought the elusive G-spot to the forefront with a study of more than 1,800 female twins. The study suggests that there is no genetic basis for the G-spot and that environmental or psychological factors may contribute to whether a woman believes that she has a G-spot. The new study is published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine.
But it also was careful to offer important specifics about the “limited nature” of this study:
But the lead study author, clinical psychologist Andrea Burri, isn’t sure that the question was asked in a way that accurately got the information the researchers were seeking, as reflected in the study’s discussion section.
Her team did not physically examine the women for the presence of G-spots but instead gave participants a survey asking whether they believed that they had a “so called G-spot, a small area the size of a 20p coin on the front wall of your vagina that is sensitive to deep pressure?” (A 20p coin is about the size of an American nickel.)
And opposing (scientific and otherwise) opinions:
The definition of G-spot in the study is too specific and doesn’t take into account that some women perceive their G-spots as bigger or smaller, or higher or lower, said Debby Herbenick, research scientist at Indiana University and author of the book “Because It Feels Good.”
“It’s not so much that it’s a thing that we can see, but it has been pretty widely accepted that many women find it pleasurable, if not orgasmic, to be stimulated on the front wall of the vagina,” said Herbenick, who was not involved in the study.
And…
The G-spot has been so difficult to identify because it is more of a physiological change — akin to swallowing or urinating — than an anatomic structure such as a nipple, said Dr. Irwin Goldstein, director of sexual medicine at Alvarado Hospital in San Diego, California, who oversees the peer review process for the Journal of Sexual Medicine.
And mentions a study with the EXACT OPPOSITE conclusion…the G Spot is real:
But a recent study that adds credence to the G-spot concept. French researchers Odile Buisson and Pierre Foldès did ultrasounds of a small number of women having intercourse with men. By looking at the changes in the vagina, the researchers found physiological evidence of the G-spot. This study is under review at the Journal of Sexual Medicine, Goldstein said.
A small study by Italian researchers in the Journal of Sexual Medicine in 2008 found that women who were able to achieve vaginal orgasms had thicker tissue between the vagina and the urethra, where the G-spot is said to reside.
A minority of women say they ejaculate when they have a G-spot orgasm. Some sex researchers say this fluid comes from a gland that’s near the G-spot area.
What is the G Spot?
The G-spot is named after Dr. Ernst Grafenberg, a gynecologist known for his research on female genitalia. He described this pleasure zone of the vagina in a 1950 paper.
What do I think of the British study?
I think it was based on almost silly premises:
1) You can prove the existence of physiological phenomena by asking study participants if they believe they have one.
If my doctor asked me about whether I believed I had a prostate, how could I answer that in a way that offered any “scientifically” valuable information?
2) If the G Spot exists, all women would have equal ability to experience its benefits.
We know all women have a clitoris. Not all can locate it. And, certainly, not all that can locate it are equally capable or skilled at stimulating it.
3) Proper stimulation of the G Spot has nothing to do with technique or the woman’s sexual partner.
The reason this study utilized twins was because it was supposed to lend some sort of “genetic” credibility to the results. “If the G Spot is real, and you study two twins, they should both have similar experiences relative to its benefits, right?” Wrong.
Unless the twins are married to the same man and “searching for their G Spot” in exactly the same way…in exactly the same circumstances…at exactly the same moment in time…there is virtually NO logical benefit to the “twins” angle. Twins may be more genetically similar than any other two random women, but they are married to completely different men and in completely different marriages and life experiences.
4) The intent of finding and stimulating the G Spot is ONLY to “add pressure” to already overly stressed (relative to sex) men and women.
It is true that some couples do this. They make their quest to find the G Spot and achieve G Spot orgasms the “be all end all” of their sexual endeavors.
For many reasons, we recommend that no couple do this.
Are G spot orgasms amazing, deeply pleasurable and intense experiences? Yes.
And, G Spot orgasms are (usually) the only type of orgasms that allows a couple to experience female ejaculation.
But…
1) G Spot orgasms are (usually) NOT possible without more time, effort and energy than most of us have to invest during our “normal, day-to-day” sexual opportunities. There is no such thing as a “quickie” G Spot orgasm. They are best to be considered the “icing” of your sex life…not “the cake.”
2) G Spot orgasms are, by definition, less “convenient” for most couples. To achieve the level of sexual excitement and abandon necessary to achieving a G Spot orgasm, most women need the ability to be physically and vocally uninhibited (much bed spring noises and loud screaming). Those of us that have kids or live in apartments don’t always have the opportunity for this type of uninhibited passion.
3) G Spot orgasms are so potentially deep and intense that (as opposed to most other sexual activity) your sexual fitness must be considered. You have to walk before you can run. If you are “out of practice,” sexually, and you are not used to the type of intense, whole-body orgasms that G Spot stimulation can produce, it might be possible to experience G Spot stimulation and orgasms as being as much “work” as they are fun.
4) Describing G Spot orgasms as deeper and more intense and different than standard clitoral orgasms is NOT exactly the same thing as suggesting that they are “better” in the sense that they should be your ultimate (and certainly not your only) sexual goal. I like to dine at fancy, expensive restaurants occasionally. There are culinary delights and experiences that you will never experience any other way. But, would I want to dine that way every night? Would I truly want to put on the tie and jacket and make the “investment” required…every night? Probably not.
Why do I believe the G Spot is real?
1) I’ve found Susan’s and we’ve both experienced the amazing pleasure it makes possible.
I think it’s important to note that, as I describe in The Ultimate Guide To The Female G Spot, it took me quite some time to do this. In fact, it took me YEARS. And, for these years, although I was convinced (by my research) that the G Spot existed, I had NO actual proof in MY EXPERIENCE because, until Sue and I both agreed we had EVIDENCE…we couldn’t be sure, could we?
Why might this be the case that it took us so long to actually find personal EVIDENCE of the existence of the G Spot?
a) Finding and stimulating the G Spot is one of the most “technical” of sexual techniques. If you are familiar with my work, you know that I am fond of saying that most sex is NOT “rocket science.” But…finding and stimulating the G Spot, in some regards IS rocket science. It takes a very specific understanding of what you are looking for…how to know you’ve found it…and what to do when you have.
b) Achieving a G Spot orgasm is NOT just about the technical skill. For the most part, if you know where your wife’s clitoris is located…and you correctly stimulate it…it’s not all that difficult to produce a clitoral orgasm. But, this is NOT the case with G Spot orgasms. Not ONLY do you have to correctly find and stimulate the female G Spot, but the woman has to be properly “prepared” and “knowledgeable” about what is happening…and what to expect. It requires a level of sexual relaxation and trust and motivation that is not usually required for your standard “day-to-day” sexual experiences.
2) I’ve helped hundreds of others, through our book and personal coaching, to do the same.
Part of the “assumption” of the British study was that achieving a G Spot orgasm might be just “wishful thinking”…that, even those that “think” they have experienced this sort of orgasm are just fooling themselves. Basically, they are equating those of us that have experienced G Spot orgasms in our marriage with a teenager acting high after his buddy slipped him an oregano “joint.”
This “assumption” might make sense IF experiencing a G Spot orgasm didn’t ALSO entail PHYSICAL and PHYSIOLOGICAL aspects that couldn’t be explained away as “wishful thinking.”
G Spot orgasms are described as SIGNIFICANTLY “deeper” than “day-to-day” clitoral orgasms. They are described as being “whole body” orgasms that are not concentrated just in the woman’s vaginal area.
G Spot orgasms, generally, last SIGNIFICANTLY longer than clitoral orgasms and involve “wave upon wave” of orgasmic contractions and cycles.
G Spot orgasms, usually, involve some amount of “female ejaculate” that is NOT present during standard clitoral orgasms. Although this “ejaculate” is not the “gushers” most men might expect if they have been exposed to “female ejaculation pornography,” but it is definitely a greater volume than the woman’s normal level of “lubrication” and looks, tastes and smells different than vaginal lubrication.
3) Anatomy and physiology point to the existence of the female G Spot…NOT to it being a myth.
a) Male and female anatomy is, essentially, the same in almost all regards. Men and women start their young lives with EXACTLY the same “parts.” At some time, early in pregnancy, the fetus is given a “hormone bath” that determines their future gender. Basically, depending on which type of “hormone bath” the fetus receives, their (identical) genital parts develop into either male or female “versions” of those parts. So, there is a corresponding male/female “part” for each corresponding “part” in the opposite sex. The clitoris is, essentially, a smaller, different shaped penis that resides more internal than the male penis. But, their basic “structure” is essentially the same.
b) Men have a prostate which produces “prostatic fluid” and so it makes logical sense that females would have the corresponding “part”…the G Spot…with its “prostatic fluid”…female ejaculate. The female G spot, if real, would be located exactly where it has been theorized it is…in, essentially, the same place the prostate is located in men.
c) Recent studies (I trust), such as the ultrasound study have supported…not disproved…the existence of the female G Spot.
Below is a super brief overview video of how to (start) to locate and stimulate the female G Spot…
If you are interested in finding it for yourself, check out our book, The Ultimate Guide To The Female G Spot.
VIDEO: Finding And Stimulating The Female G Spot
Warning: This video is an animation (not using live models) and is as “tasteful” as possible considering the subject. But it may be NSFW (Not safe for work) or safe to view with children looking over your shoulder.
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